27 September 2008

Am I upside down or is the world?!


I'm feeling so sick watching my friend. She's all starry eyed and is just melting off like an ice cream! I turn to my right and my other two friends are no better and all because it's their favorite hero on screen whose doing a stupid song-n-dance routine right now! Me? No way! This guy? Ugh! I keep seeing the real guy he is and not who he is trying to be. I keep seeing a birdbrain who smokes worse than a steam engine, a pompous ass with an inflated head so big that you wouldn't find a cap that’s large enough and this fellow is supposed to be an youth icon! Man! The kinda message this guy delivers to the young crowd.
Anyway... am supposed to be enjoying this movie right now. Mission impossible. Just tell me why would anyone want to know how a loser of a guy (aka the hero) gets over his jealousy on his wife's hot boyfriend?! Some story! Sometimes I think I don't belong here, with my three 'friends' I mean....three Barbie doll wannabes and a bohemian chick....it doesn't need a rocket scientist to figure the odd-one-out, right?!
The torture ends after 2 and half-hours. I am in a pensive mood as I get out of the torture cell, where? Oh where was my bloody brain when I had actually paid 50% of my month's pocket money and got myself an undisturbed 2 hrs of pure and unfiltered boredom! And on top of that, there was an offer too....free headache with every ticket! We got onto our bikes (their bikes actually which were all a sickly shade of baby boo pink! yuck!) and got out of the torture grounds, which was a very challenging task given the fact that a weenie mosquito couldn't have found any space to park its butt.
Once on the road, my friend started off about the movie. This is what I dread after going through a mundane movie, its the “Lets-analyze-each-and-every-shot” discussion. Me being the pillion rider, couldn't get away and had to drop monosyllables like “Yup” “Right” “Nope” every now and then think you got the picture.
We stopped over at one of the over priced ice cream parlors (the kind I feel do a job no different than highway robbers) I would have loved a cup of hot SLV coffee instead. Anyway, paid up with what was left in my jute purse and gorged on some frozen blob of ultra sweet fat. By the time I was out of the place, my poor purse had decided to file for bankruptcy. That’s when it hit me, I could save myself from being declared a pauper right now!
One of my friends, an 'always-borrow-never-return' type, had borrowed 500 bucks from me some(a long)time ago. I think this is the right time to give her a gentle reminder about it. What's wrong in asking back YOUR own money?! I got the 'how can you be so cheap?' and "what's money in friendship" looks when I brought it up. I mean, c'mon! It's mine for heavens sake and YOU should be the one feeling like a heel for not returning it! After they had gotten over the initial shock that their friend was so petty, the girl in question brushed it off with a 'Oh! Right.....'. I reacted with 'I kinda want it now'. More horrified looks followed and as she was fishing out the dough from her purse, she had the look on her face that equated to a poor girl being forced to give her hard earned savings to a bandit!
As I pocketed the loot, something told me I would never be a part of this group anymore. Thinking about the kinda movies I was forced to watch and the kinda mindless conversations I had to tolerate, I felt liberated! but if they decide to forgive me, I'm gonna inquire about my shoes the other one had borrowed a week back.

The unusual journey of a foundling


I am trying to unlock the door...THE door, not my home's door or MY door...I say 'THE' because I don’t feel a sense of belonging with it....the apartment I mean. Hi, I am Vibha. Working, Single, Struggling.

Working...to make ends meet, to have a better life than the one I have, to survive.
Single....in every sense..no friends, no soul mate, no family.
Struggling.....to understand the Purpose of my life on this planet at this particular time period where people are mundane enough to follow “Reality” shows and never ending soaps.

I am an Orphan. I was told that I had been brought to the Orphanage’s doorstep when I was a month old. I grew up with the nuns who took care of the place. I did well at school, went through college and landed with a job. A boring 9 to 5 job with work so monotonous, it could drive anyone crazy but hey! That’s not important as long as you got money, right? Money to live in a world that runs on this special paper. Now that I had a source of income, was deemed independent enough to be on my own…in other words, was kicked out of the only place in the whole wide world that I was familiar with. That I had mistaken to be my permanent abode.

Three months later….
Vibha here. I have news for you…Shantanu. Yes, that’s his name. He is one of my colleagues. A wonderful man whom I am currently dating. I am feeling a bit strange. I don’t know how to express that feeling. What is this that I feel so strongly towards this man? Love? Care? Whatever it is, it does feel good! It feels good to have a cup of coffee with a pinch of laughter, to have a meal spiced up with conversation, to feel so alive with a touch, a hug, a kiss. I am certainly thankful for having such a wonderful man to share my life with…but I still don’t get that sense of belonging. There is something missing and I am unable to find that missing piece in the Jigsaw puzzle of my life.

Three Years Later…
My name is Vibha. Vibha Shantanu. I got married to my sweetheart after a courtship of a year. Married life was a piece of heaven. Never could have asked for more, but I did get something more than I had asked or even hoped for.  It had been two years of martial bliss when I got to experience the journey to motherhood... I  was being rushed to the Hospital. I was about to deliver my baby.

A Painful Miracle later....
I felt so strange the moment my tiny, ‘just delivered’ daughter was placed in my arms. This was something I had never experienced in my entire life...Seeing another soul sharing my blood. I had never seen that before! No parents, no siblings, no cousins, no aunts or uncles in my life. Even my husband, my soul mate, the one I love, the one who has brought joy to my life does not share my blood but this tiny life in my hand does. I finally felt it.The sense of belonging.

The water we breathe

Hello readers! This story is based on a thought I had during my daily commute to office. I had jolted down the idea least I forget! Thi...